Posted on December 20, 2009 - by John Robb

Rage On!

John Robb is vocalist in the punk rock band Goldblade and The Membranes. He  is the author of ‘Death To Trad Rock’ an account of the eighties DIY underground in the UK as well as ‘The North Will Rise Again- Manchester Music City from 1976 to 1996′, ‘Stone Roses And The Resurrection Of British Pop; and the best selling ‘Punk Rock: An Oral History’.

John is constantly in demand as a “cultural commentator” & frequently appears as a journalist/commentator in a variety of press.

Like nearly everyone left with any sanity I hadn’t looked at the UK charts for years. When you are totally immersed in music, the pop charts seem like some sort of strange side show of talent-show nobodies who have their one hit before rushing back to the dole office.

But this Christmas it’s been thrilling. The Facebook campaign to get Rage to number one has made the charts suddenly really interesting.

Everyone knows that rock music doesn’t really get in the top ten, no radio play and a media that is ninety per cent playground for Simon Cowell and ten per cent for indie bands leaves rock bands on the outside where they carry on being the biggest bands in the world whilst the charts reflect momentary lapses in taste from a public that is easier to hoodwink with every passing year.

The RATM campaign started by a married couple is a triumph for people power. An idea that rollercoasted to number one it captured people’s imagination.

Cowell, of course, has been the moaning bad sport that we expected, recently he has been talking about turning his slippery hand to politics and his dirty tricks campaign in the last week with the chart battle have shown he has all the correct mentality to be a politician. Claiming that his gormless singer was David compared to the RATM Goliath was hilarious when in reality the Rage campaign was a Facebook event started by two fans bored of the one hundred per cent media saturation enjoyed by X Factor and its six month TV and tabloid campaign to get the Christmas number one- the jelly like ogre Cowell tried to look like he really cared about his young charge but we all know that when the slightly dim young singer slides down the charts Cowell will drop him like a stone.

What people are objecting to in this whole campaign is the media monopoly employed by Cowell and his shitty cynicism as he gets everyone to fall into line and support his latest whim. Cowell is a cynic who has tapped into the easily swayed morass of couch porridge UK public- the sort of people who think that Cheryl Cole’s crocodile tears are genuine and the sort of people who think that high drama and emotional TV is some talentless goon not winning a final of a huckster talent show- save the tears for the millions starving in the world you tragic deluded people!

X factor is about the judges- the ‘singers’ are mere props for the judge’s egos and attempt to sell their own brands- from the creepy Louis Walsh to Cowell’s arch cynicism. The dolly bird quotient is made up with Danni Minogue- the talentless sister of Kylie, her fellow judge is Cherry Cole whose phoney emotional outbursts pack us much passion as her cardboard singing. Admittedly Girls Aloud have made some great records but that’s little to do with the ‘group’ who were assembled in another talent show, the songs are written by expert teams of songwriters who are at their best when they make Girls Aloud sound like the Sugababes- the best girl pop band of these rank times. All Girls Aloud have to do is pout and show their gussets to the slavering paparazzi- not a bad day’s work when all you have to do is you keep your knickers clean.

Cole has achieved everything you want in modern life- she has hit records, a solo career and a dumb footballer boyfriend- she is that nation’s tabloid sweetheart- a pretty face for spotty fourteen year olds to wank over as they imagine getting their grubby hands into her padded bra.    And that’s ok- soft porn is a valid route to the top these days- but please don’t these people dictate what music we get to hear.

Cowell is the ringmaster whose whole raison d’ etre is to pump up his own name as the sad parade of freaks and losers sing pub songs in the auditions. One of them gets their big hit and disappears- naming many of the winners of X factor is a great pub game- a litany of lost names who have hopefully readjusted to real life with their video collection of their moment in the sun- I wonder how much help the caring Cowell gives to the forgotten, soporific crooners that he has tossed aside in his endless quest to puff himself up.

The Rage single, is brilliant and eclectic, exciting piece of rock and rap music made by a multi racial band who write their own songs and deliver them with the conviction of people who live for music- the opposite of X factor. Bizarrely smug media columnists hate Rage- their lives are far too comfortable to feel the power of this music- the media smartasses like to pretend they are thrilled by the spectacle of X factor whilst they are sinking into the deceitful trough of couch porridge of the modern bread and circus cathode ray tube. How could they understand our world? The world of community, going out, wild music and great bands- they know nothing about this and they blank our world out and don’t allow us into their over protected media compound. Rock is blanked out by the media.

Rage are a poke in the eye for this abject laziness and their number one is a thrilling pop moment- one of those rare moments when a record gets in the charts that people don’t get…just like it used to be…the idea that most of the country don’t get the song is brilliant- the idea that you won’t hear it on the radio is hilarious.

Everywhere you go in the UK in 2009 you hear their shit records- daytime radio is a moribund musical graveyard of cowardly musical choices. The soundtrack to our lives is the same- every bar, every shop plays energy sapping dull music, even when I go the gym all I get to hear is watered down pop shit- complain and they say that’s what people want to hear but everyone hates it.

And because of this Rage is a momentary rising up, an aural V sign and that’s why it rules!